March 26, 2012
-
I found my apartment in Dallas. I will be living in the Addison area...
I am not saying much on the... Topic... Everyone who knows me.... Knows I am terrified... Stressed... And will likely not survive living there for 9mo...
You can say, be optimistic... You will be fine...
No no no... You don't understand the amount of my dependency on people... Even I didn't realize it... Until recently... Very recently... Nor... My fear of people... Huge huge fear of people... It's going to end up in disaster.
I had a fugging panic attack... Not even an hour ago thinking about this... It will not be fine... No no no...
It will be...
A bloody disaster.
Comments (6)
You know what I've had written on April 1st of my calendar for months now, ever since you announced that you'll be moving to Texas? "Shawn Ashley moves to Texas." This matter has been on my mind and heart for as long as it has been on yours and you can rest assured that I'll be praying with you this whole time.
Have you looked around Xanga to see if there are some nice Xangans in the Dallas area you might get in touch with? I know a lovely Xangan who lives in Ft. Worth!
Addison is an amazing place! I hope you love it there...there are about a million cool restaurants!
@Ancient_Scribe - ... I don't like... Strangers.... It won't happen.
@NightCometh - I noticed the restaurants already... Perhaps it will be okay... It won't solve my social anxiety... And dependency issue... But perhaps... it will be okay.
@devour_my_broken_soul - LOL...I think I was the stranger he was talking about, funnily.
@NightCometh - I figured as much when I saw you commented him and vice versa and... Your location said Fort Worth/Dallas
Fear and dependency are a really fucking bad mix.
Talk. to. People.
It doesn't fucking matter if you barely know them or if they're going to be around in ten years. Just fucking find someone. Even if you only talk about nailpolish and Muse, it's better than nothing. People keep us leveled and sane, even when we don't want to fucking believe that.
I know it's not in your personality type and I know it's not easy for you. At least fucking try.
There's an idiot reading over my shoulder. I need to go continue showing people how easily I can pin them to the ground because they can't keep their fucking eyes off of where they're going to be in .5seconds.
Comments are closed.